in 2004, the science fiction education film "Happy Planet" set a new high in ratings, and in the fourth season, it broke the ratings record.

in an era when there was no science fiction, the "futuristic" planet where old urchins, lotus buns, iced lemons and polyhedrons lived opened up a dream world for children.

in the minds of the post-90s generation, "Happy Planet" undoubtedly represents "childhood memories".

as the youngest "Ice Lemon" Zhang Zhaoyi at that time, Zhang Zhaoyi was also spoiled by the crew because of his cute personality, and he also gained a large number of fans outside the play.

what people didn't expect is that the lively and lovely "Ice Lemon" was tormented by domestic violence and claimed to have been beaten by his mother since childhood.

recently, Zhang Zhaoyi posted a photo of her injury after she posted an article accusing her mother of domestic violence. In the picture, she looks pale, her nose is badly hurt, and her eyes are filled with tears, full of helplessness and sadness.

she wrote: "it's all right, young man." No one knows your pain. Just run away, no more beatings, no more accusations every day. It's not your fault, you just got beat up when you were a kid! Grandma won't cry with you anymore, and dad has run away from the family. "

Zhang Zhaoyi's words are full of disappointment, and it is obvious that she is trying to adapt to what is in front of her, trying to let go, and trying to move on.

and it was none other than Zhang Zhaoyi's mother who started all this.

growing up, Zhang Zhaoyi's mother always adhered to the educational concept of "a filial son under a stick." she taught Zhang Zhaoyi very harshly.

when filming Happy Planet, Zhang Zhaoyi was the youngest of the crew. Tired of shooting, the other children couldn't help complaining, and only Zhang Zhaoyi sat cleverly by the side.

Zhao Keming, who plays the old urchin, said bluntly:

"I have never seen such a clever child. She (Zhang Zhaoyi) is like an adult. She doesn't cry."

growing up under this "easy to be beaten" way of education, Zhang Zhaoyi naturally behaved as "clever and sensible."

but when children's nature is strangled, can they still be called children?

in the eyes of some parents, it seems that only severe beating and scolding can get the success of their children.

but in the words of parents, "beating is scolding is love" and "filial son comes out under the stick".... Can children really grow up healthily?

in fact, behind these sayings lies the ignorance and laziness of parents.

there are great hidden dangers in using force instead of preaching and authority instead of communication.

in an episode of "Juvenile talk", a fourth-grade girl shouted out her mother's "five forbids".

first, you are not allowed to copy wrong questions; second, you are not allowed to misread the plus or minus sign; third, you are not allowed to make obvious mistakes; fourth, you are not allowed to be careful; and fifth, you are not allowed to write wrong numbers.

if she can't, her mother will hit her hard with a ruler or rubber sole, which makes her hate to do her homework now.

with regard to her daughter's complaint, the mother said that there was nothing wrong with this kind of education, that children needed education, and that only strict methods could teach them lessons.

she also believes that children must be hit, if not hit, they will be a little floating.

although the mother reiterated again and again that she wanted to give her child the best education and that her child could achieve the ideal result.

only in this way can the child grow up and grow up, and her life will be without regrets.

mothers think about the future of their children, but never think about the real meaning of homework, and after-school homework is to consolidate the knowledge learned in class.

if children are afraid of homework, how can they love learning?

an anonymous netizen once shared his growing experience, which resonated with many netizens.

from 4 to 12 years old, he was beaten by his father twice a week on average.

he was beaten for a variety of reasons, and as long as he was not satisfied with one thing, he had to be beaten.

this life lasted until the age of 12, when he began to use cold violence against his father.

the relationship between father and son has dropped to a freezing point, sometimes without even saying hello to each other. Living under the same roof, they are like strangers.

later, the father compromised and promised not to hit the child again, but the promise lasted only two weeks, and he was beaten with blood all over his back.

under his father's education, his academic performance is at the top of the class. He also has two friends whose experiences are particularly similar to his, and so are his parents' educational methods.

people who feel sorry for each other always have endless topics, but then one of the friends became mentally ill and was sent to a mental hospital, while the other friend suffered from depression after failing in the college entrance examination.

he also failed in the college entrance examination, 2 points short of the ordinary university. His father pointed at him on the nose and asked him to repeat it, but he refused.

Father and son quarreled so much that he ran away from home directly. No one expected that a child with such excellent grades would eventually become a cook.

and the impact of domestic violence is more than that. Because of his lack of communication skills, he became withdrawn and seemed to be a freak in the eyes of his colleagues.

now, he hasn't come home to see his father for many years.Dear, the father-son relationship in which blood is thicker than water has become thinner than paper.

compared with this netizen, Hollywood star Judy Garland has gone to the other extreme.

at the age of 16, Judy Garland became famous for starring in the Wizard of Oz, and her role as Dorothy became a moonlight in the minds of countless fans.

she ranked eighth among the top 100 actresses of the 20th century, behind Marilyn Monroe and Elizabeth Taylor.

but because she grew up in her mother's beating and scolding education, Judy Jialan Mingyan hides an inferiority complex under her appearance.

as an adult, she can't do without psychotropic drugs, as if only when she paralyzes her nerves, she doesn't feel so much pain. Her five marriages were unfortunate and she died in an exotic bathroom at the age of 47.

she has an inferiority complex all her life, longing for love, but dare not have it.

when she grows up, whenever a man is kind to her, Judy Garland will think it is love, then rush into it, and end up black and blue.

according to Judy Garland's husbands, she is a person with a strong desire to control, and whenever there is any change in the wind, she will be nervous and appear as if she is facing an archenemy.

there are many girls like Judy Garland in real life.

once a netizen shared her growing experience. She grew up in an environment of beating and scolding and was always belittled by her family.

this led to her inferiority complex when she grew up and talked about a good boyfriend when she was in college. Her boyfriend loves her so much that he keeps many little things in mind.

while enjoying the love given by her boyfriend, the netizen could not believe that she really had it, and she began to fall into self-contradiction.

once, when she saw her boyfriend getting very close to a female classmate, she became panicked and began to control her boyfriend's dating.

the unease is growing. In addition to making friends, the netizen is also trying to master the life of his boyfriend. Finally, her boyfriend couldn't stand the high-pressure control and broke up with her.

netizens wash their faces with tears every day, but it doesn't help.

for children who have been beaten, although scars can heal, they will last forever.

domestic violence, it is easy for children to become inferiority, cowardice, and bullying, and even the proportion of suicide and crime will be higher than that of normal families, and they are very likely to acquire violence and bring domestic violence to their future families.

Education is an important and difficult subject, which will affect the rest of a child's life.

corporal punishment, which is often used by parents, will not only cause a serious psychological shadow to their children, but also plant violent factors in their bodies.

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at first, because of the great disparity in strength between parents and children, children will suppress their feelings of resistance.

as children grow older, when they have the ability to compete with their parents, they will often conflict with their parents.

Children's rebellion is like a rapidly coming hill fire, but the outbreak of the hill fire is not accidental, which is closely related to the parents' education.

therefore, it is urgent to replace violent punishment with other educational methods.

here, my uncle would like to recommend some more effective ways of education.

first, make rules in advance, reward well, and replace corporal punishment in other ways.

there was a mother who shared her parenting experience. She bought her child a star icon with rules on the left and weeks on the top right.

if the child successfully completes the task of the day, she will paste a little star to the child.

Xiao Xing can offset her merits and demerits, or she can directly exchange for rewards, but when she encounters problems of principle, her mother will still take measures of punishment. For example, no cartoons are allowed for a week.

under the education of Bao Ma, although the child is still young, he already knows what to do and what not to do.

second, parents should learn to control their emotions, communicate rationally with their children, and stand up with their children to bear the consequences if necessary.

it is inevitable for children to get into trouble, which is in their nature. While outputting the rules, parents should also learn to use love to guide their children to think.

in 2021, Qi Qi, a 9-year-old from Changzhou, Jiangsu Province, accidentally scratched a car while riding a bike.

then he thought it was funny again, so he scratched 14 cars in succession.

after receiving the report from the car owner, the police found Cookie's parents.

parents are also angry, but instead of corporal punishment, they bring their children home to apologize.

Cookie and her parents bowed and apologized to the car owner and promised to bear the cost of repairing the car.

in the process, Cookie was deeply aware of her mistakes.

he promised his parents that he would never do it again. When he grows up, he will return the 20,000 yuan to his parents.

Cookie parents' education is to set an example for their children by setting an example, and they are willing to go door-to-door with their children and apologize to the car owner.

on the one hand, they want their children to really realize their mistakes.

on the other hand, they want their children to know that no matter what happens, Mom and Dad are behind you.

but in reality, many parents, after learning that their children are in trouble, will lose their temper and beat their children at first, saying that they will learn a long lesson.

although beating and scolding can make the child be soft, do the child really know that he is wrong?

not necessarily.

they are just afraid of the authority of their parents and make promises after seeking advantages and avoiding disadvantages.

such a promise is like an unsigned and sealed document, and it is only a stopgap measure for children to help them avoid temporary punishment.

it is far more painful for children to see their parents being punished for their own mistakes than to beat them directly.

A line appeared in Dog Thirteen: "I hit you because I love you, for your own good. You'll understand when you grow up."

but education is not a paradox, it is not the way I hit you to prove that I love you.

True love is a kind of emotional communication, it is a kind of action experience, but also a kind of understanding and respect.

A book is published under authorization.